What is Relational Trauma and Attachment Wounds?
What is Relational Trauma and
Attachment Wounds?
Relational Trauma and Attachment Wounds happens when someone experiences emotional or psychological harm in important relationships. This can be with family members, partner, close friends, or caregivers.
Trauma can be such a heavy word, but it can happen to anyone, encompassing both Big “T” Trauma and small “t” trauma. Big “T” Trauma is what most people are familiar with, but what is the small “t” trauma?
This refers to less memorable misfortunes during childhood, but the impact is far more damaging to the psyche and has long lasting negative effect from what seems like an insignificant event.
Essentially, Big “T” Trauma involves bad things happening, whereas little “t” trauma is when good things not happening when they should. It can be parents being physically present but emotionally unavailable, experiencing loss or separation (whether long-term or short-term), bullying, harassment, or even mild neglect. While these experiences may not be life threatening, they can be very distressing to the person experiencing them and vary significantly from person to person. It occurs when:
There is too much too soon.
There is too much for too long.
There is not enough for too long.
These hurtful interactions, if unresolved, can make it hard for a person to trust themselves and others, feel safe in relationships, or maintain healthy connections both with themselves and others.
Knowingly or unknowingly, this trickles down, influencing them to suppress their feelings and adapt in ways that affect all areas of their lives, including mental health, emotional well-being, physical health, habits, and more.